Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Oy Vey

If anyone's still out there, you've certainly noticed that my posts have slowed down quite a bit. That usually happens during migraine week, which was worse than usual this month, plus I had a cold. But a lot of it is just me being totally and utterly exhausted.

The pain is still there, still exhausting, but that's not why I keep finding myself face-down, half-conscious, with nightmarish visions flitting through my head of myself committing outrageous crimes. Not entirely, I think.

See, I'm caught in this bizarre situation in which a crazy person (also known as the forces of hell) keeps attacking me and my family and now our religious beliefs. Which is not that unusual, you might think, but it's quite a dilemma trying to figure out how to deal appropriately with someone who insists, beyond all reason or evidence, that you, your family, and your whole church are not in fact Christian, as you claim to be.

I mean, what's the Christian response to that? I'll tell you what my instinctive response is, though I've never used it: "Don't be stupid." Seriously, who would know better whether I worship and revere Jesus Christ as the savior of the world and more particularly of me, too? Who knows more about my church, someone who's once heard a lecture by someone who opposes my church, or me, a 6th-generation member of it? Where can you find the best evidence? This answer sounds scornful, and I feel that way. I wonder how anyone can be so insane.

But that's not what I say. I wish I didn't have to say anything; I wouldn't if it was just some jerk talking to me. I'd try to politely correct the misconception, but I'd just have to let it drop, because people who say these things don't want to be corrected. And this is what The Man did the other night when he was talking to Satan Herself about the possibility of #1 Son being baptized. Despite her ravings, he was very controlled and polite as he tried to present evidence that our church does in fact believe in Jesus as the son of God and Savior of the world. We know she won't take my word for it that it's raining when she can feel the drops, but she might have accepted something he said. But no. Her response was that her information was true, but it wasn't known to anyone so "low down" in the church. Only those "high up" were in on the secret.

Here, the rude part of me wanted to roll its eyes and say "Oh. What. Ever." But that would be taken as agreement. Anyway, it's like that. She insists that #1 Son will go straight to hell if he should ever take such a drastic step as to be baptized, and she tells him so in no uncertain terms. (I won't even bother describing the desire to roll eyes and be sarcastic here. It will have occurred to you already.) And after 4 years of this, it's no wonder the boy won't admit to even the desire anymore. (See also TM's blog entry.) It's depressing. But my husband is so full of faith, he's not giving up, so I am trying to hang on to the hope, too.

But I'm so tired...

5 comments:

Jen said...

I'm sorry. I hope your migraines are better soon! Hugs.

Renee said...

I too hope that your migraines are better soon and that the reason for your main headache goes away too.
I think a lot of people just don't understand your religion and believe some of the bad things that they have heard about it. But it seems to me that the evil one wouldn't care what you believed, she would be against it.
I know it pains you but one day #1 will be old enough to choose to get baptized on his own and her influence won't matter. Are the other boys baptized yet? Perhaps seeing his brothers baptized would help.
hugs

oh, thanks for both complements you left on my blog. I agree that DD is a cute kid but that picture doesn't do her justice. She had her hair in 3 day old french braids with half of it falling out.

Jack said...

You are so much nicer than I am. I actually do laugh at them. Tell them that if they think they know more than I do about the church which I have attended my entire life, which has been in my family for, like, a century and a half . . . well, I do my level best to make them feel as stupid as that sounds.

I mean, they can disagree with what the church teaches, they can think it is a mistake for me or anyone to attend it and they're even free to tell my kids what they think. I love it when my kids ask questions. I love teaching my kids the difference beteween "fact" and "opinion" and the opportunity to teach them how to think critically. I love it when I'm forced to think critically about things I've assumed. But telling me I don't understand my own religion?

Man . . . there's nothing un-Christian about calling a pharisee a pharisee, know what I mean?

Although I'm positive I'll get the pearly gates and Peter's going to greet me with, "So, Jack, you think you know what it takes to get through here, huh?"

Kory O said...

I think this broad might be related to my sister in law (aka Wicked Witch of the West).

I get tons of crap from her about Christianity.....and it's just so delightful when my brother decides to join in with his "there is no God" rant as an accompanying lecture. Apparently there are forest fairies and desert spirits, creator energies, and other critters cribbed out of "The Lord of the Rings" and maybe even "Star Wars", but no God. Yet I'm the one believing in made up stories.....

All I do when they get cranked up about it and other "brilliant" things we have to go over ad nauseam is remind myself of a saying I heard at a customer service seminar the city made me attend many years ago: You can't fix stupid, so don't even try.

More practical advice....put the phone on mute and snark back. It still won't solve the stupid problem, face it, nothing will, but it might help your blood pressure.

Hang in there, girl. Sorry you are going through this.

Scone said...

Jen: Thanks. I've had a few days without them lately, and it's such a relief.

Renee: Thanks, too. You're right that there's a lot of misinformation and rumor out there about our church. I can understand that, and I'd love to talk to anybody about it who really is curious. Anybody who's willing to accept that I know more about it than they do simply because I have the insider knowledge and experience, for example. In other worse, anyone sane. But you're right, she'd be against whatever I do just because I do it. Sigh.

I hope her influence won't matter then, but it seems to matter now (since she *says* he's free to do it but he's too scared of her to actually do it). In our church, the age for baptism is 8 years (or older, obviously), so Pirate Boy has a little over a year to go. He wanted to badly to be baptized then; he was counting down the days on the calendar. But she wouldn't hear of it. I worry about that kid's future.

Jack: Dude, I'd love to see you deal with this woman. I'd sell tickets. Unfortunately, your strategy only works on sane people.

Kory: I'm totally with you there. I have a feeling that a lot of the "pagans" out there are just in it because it's trendy. But maybe that's just the ones I've met. I love your advice about "can't fix stupid." No kidding you can't. Sigh.