Thursday, March 27, 2008

Bloody Hell

OK, it's not quite that bad, but you remember that root canal? Oh yeah. Went in Monday, spent 90 minutes in the chair, got what seemed like 90 shots to keep me numb ('cause I react badly to novocaine, as some of you may recall), and had a gallon of liquid sodium spilled in my mouth (ACK!), only to have the doc say, "I can't finish this in one session; you'll have to come back." Right.

So I left, my aching tooth stuffed with cotton and my twisted mouth unable to even sip through a straw. I scheduled the rest of my procedure for Wednesday and put off the appointment for getting a crown until later. Much later.

Wednesday, I only spent an hour in the chair, still got a lot of shots, but at least didn't end up gagging on sodium. The doc jabbed and poked and drilled and finally said, "I can't do this one; I'm sending you to a specialist." Argh.

Once again, numb face, twisted mouth, aching tooth full of cotton-- and no resolution.

Come to think of it, that sounds a lot like our marriage counseling sessions.

8 comments:

Renee said...

Have you had to pay this idiot? Oh my goodness. (my dh had to fire his dentist for being an idiot who also messed him up for work.)

I hope you get your tooth fixed soon. Poor kiddo

so the marriage counceling not going so well, huh?

Scone said...

Yeah, so far I've paid several hundred dollars; the doc did say he'd apply my payment to him toward the specialist, so it might not be as bad as it could be. There's still several hundred more to pay for the crown coming up. Yech.

Sigh. The counseling is going as well as can be expected, I guess. It's just a real roller-coaster. Last time, the therapist had to explain to TM that a woman can't be physically attracted to a man she has to mother all the time. That was apparently a surprise. Things like that. And yelling (on my part) and stony silence (on TM's part) are pretty typical of any given session. OK, maybe not as well as could be expected. I think there's still hope, though. Double sigh...

Jack said...

Dang. I had a similar, though not so extreme, experience with my wisdom teeth removal. The dentist asked me if I wanted him to perform the removal or if I wanted to see an oral surgeon.

"What's the difference?" I asked.

"An oral surgeon performs many, many more than I do. He'll be much more practiced. I can remove wisdom teeth. I have done so and am willing to do so and I do a fine job. An oral surgeon will probably do it more quickly, it will be more routine and he will charge more."

So, being the cheapskate I am I elected to let my dentist do the job. I show up on the appointed day. After 45 minutes in the chair I finally had the teeth removed from one side of my mouth. It was such a difficult removal that at one point the dentist literally put his foot on the arm of the chair and yanked with his pliers. That wasn't the most alarming thing, though. The most alarming point came when he had a drill in my mouth for a bit pushing around. When he took it out I asked if he'd been drilling away some of the tooth to help remove it more easily and the dentist replied, "Well, it was part of your jaw, but yeah."

After the 45 minutes were up he said I'd need a second appointment for the other side and suggested that maybe an oral surgeon would be a better choice. "Your teeth are blocky," he explained, "that makes it a challenge."

The oral surgeon actually spent most of his time setting up. When he finally got around to my mouth he put some tool around my tooth, gave a sharp twist, there was a frighteningly loud crack, but I didn't feel anything at all. He just proceded to calmly pull my tooth out in two pieces. He may even have just used his fingers. Repeat on the second tooth. 15 minutes. No pain. Done.

Specialists are wonderful. I hope it goes better for you there. I'm sure it will.

Jack said...

Last time, the therapist had to explain to TM that a woman can't be physically attracted to a man she has to mother all the time. That was apparently a surprise.

I could understand it being a surprise. In the context of male mythology, for lack of a better term (and I'm sure there is a better term), there does exist a nurse/patient archtypal relationship. Within that type of relationship, a woman is attracted to the man specifically because she is the caregiver. Apparently that doesn't happen? I have to admit I'm surprised that the therapist would say it that way . . . a woman can't be attracted . . . I always assumed archtypes exist for a reason and that specific one implied there were women that need to be needed. Not that all women would be like that, of course. Even within the male world view, that would only be a subset of the entire female population. It does surprise me to hear that no such subset exists at all.

Or maybe it's just that "mothering" and "nursing" are more significantly distinct than I assume. I guess I could understand the degree and/or type of caregiving blurring between the two roles. At least in the mind of the recipient. I mean, they are pretty similar, right? Or have a lot of similarities, at any rate?

And I'm not commenting yea or nay on the archtype. It's not what I personally looked for in a woman, but the archtype exists and it doesn't surprise me that some men want that kind of relationship. It surprises me more to hear that the archtype only exists in the mythology.

Scone said...

I love my pedantic cousin Jack, I really do. The therapist may have said "isn't going to be" rather than "can't"; obviously, human beings are capable of just about any behavior. But I think you nailed the fact that, although (most) women do need to be needed, or at least enjoy being needed, there's a difference between a "helping through the hard times" nurse archetype and a "have to take care of you and tell you what to do every minute of the day" mother figure. I don't know how it is for everyone, but I suspect most women want their men to be strong and mature, not weak and childish. Men like to be childish, so women are often frustrated.

Jen said...

Bloody hell, indeed! Gack!

Jen said...

You said: But I think you nailed the fact that, although (most) women do need to be needed, or at least enjoy being needed, there's a difference between a "helping through the hard times" nurse archetype and a "have to take care of you and tell you what to do every minute of the day" mother figure.

I agree with this.

I like to be needed by my family, because it makes me feel important and secure in my position with them. But, them needing me to help the family unit along on a day to day basis is very different from someone sucking the life energy out of me with their personal neediness.

I think a little vulnerability is charming, but when you literally start to wonder how this guy wipes his butt when you're not around to do it for him, I draw the line.

Jack said...

Dude, are you mocking me? I had to go look up "pedantic". :) But "irony" I think I get.

Obviously, you know what I mean though. The point is, I understand how it can be a challenge to recognize when you're being too needy. Not that I think it's right, just not so astounding that someone might be surprised to learn he's too needy.

Men like to be childish, so women are often frustrated.
You make it sound like that's the man's problem.
lololololllolololllolol.

Oh man . . . you'd probably just kill me if I were your husband.